When we think of happy people, we tend to assume that their happiness comes naturally. Although it is theorised that our genetics and environment can determine 60% of our happiness, Martin Seligman (the father of ‘positive psychology’) points out that 40% of our potential happiness remains within our control.
If someone told you that you could improve something by 40%, would you not want to take control and work on those habits?
What follows are seven scientifically proven happiness-boosting habits. Like any skill, some people are innately better at some than others, but we can all improve through conscious practice.
Find out what you can do to make those gains and live your best and most happy life!
Surround yourself with happy people!
A decades-long study found that the quality relationships you enjoy will be the most significant influencer on your long-term health and happiness. The Harvard study followed second-year undergraduate students from 1936 for nearly 80 years, and rather than money, career, or possessions, it was those who had the strongest positive relationships who were not only healthier but happier in their lifetime.
It is not about quantity; instead, it is about quality. The saying goes that misery loves company—the converse also applies. Happy people will attract other happy people and spread their happiness to others.
Happy people have strong support networks, individuals they trust and can turn to if things are not going well. However, their love for these people is not solely contingent on what that person can provide for them. They will also be willing to give back to those who are supportive, cultivate relationships, invest time in meetings, and share experiences.
Practice being happy!
Like many things, happiness takes practice. Whether it is expressing gratitude for the things (and people) that you have, savouring positive experiences (however mundane), or replacing negative thoughts and self-talk with positive affirmations, all of these things can take effort. Yet happy people tend to practice them more often than not—they will find the time!
Gratitude can benefit our happiness by grounding us in the here and now, reminding us of what we currently have instead of what we wish to have in the future or feeling lost in the past. Gratitude has been scientifically shown to positively impact our happiness, both immediately and in the long term. Expressing our gratitude to others can also increase their feelings of happiness.
People are encouraged to practice gratitude at the end of the day or every couple of days, to recount the good things in their lives, and to rest easily.
Another positive habit of happy people is that they savour their experiences. In other words, they take the time to appreciate and feel the joy of a happy experience fully. Being conscious of the good in that moment, recalling the happiness a moment brought or acting out what you know you will be grateful for later, with intention.
Happy people will also engage in positive self-talk and affirmations. The internal conversation that we have every day can be susceptible to negativity. We can be our own worst critic, which can be exacerbated by the fact that we have grown up in a society that celebrates modesty and comes with the phrase “self-praise is no praise”. That is not to say that you should be cocky. Rather, you can talk to yourself positively, using positive affirmations. These positive affirmations can positively impact our wellbeing. We are our own most regular audience; we can cut the heckling and ramp up the applause.
Be optimistic!
Optimism is the generalised belief that good things will happen to us in the future. Research has shown that optimists are better able to make and keep connections and relationships. People are drawn to those who have a sunny outlook. Optimists recover better from illness, injury, and setbacks, and in general, optimists live longer.
Happy people will have a realistic level of optimism—they will not ignore warning signs, but they will believe that even in the darkest of times, things will get better. By being optimistic, happy people will look forward to their future and actively work towards their goals. By being hopeful about what may come, they are more satisfied, excited, and motivated.
Exercise and spend time in nature.
Happy people will understand and, therefore, reap the benefits of being physically active. Research has shown that exercise contributes to better mental health. It can release endorphins, and short walks can boost mood while also increasing focus and creativity.
Regular exercise also increases energy, lengthens life span, and improves sleep, self-confidence, and perception. Exercise has also been shown to decrease anxiety and depression and, in general, make people happier.
Did you know that being in natural space can also make us happier? Research is continuing to emerge about the time we spend in nature and its link to our wellbeing. Spending time in nature has been shown to increase people’s mood and decrease negative thoughts.
Happy people will also appreciate what is known as “green exercise,” sometimes dubbed exercise squared, where they combine exercise with being in natural green or blue space. By exercising outdoors they boost the positive effects of both regular exercise and being outdoors.
Know when to switch off!
Happy people know when and how to switch off. When it comes to their work, they will know how to leave the office at the end of the day and how to take regular, if not small, breaks throughout their day. These breaks make people more creative and boost productivity.
Happy people will know how to unwind and potentially do this by practising mindfulness, which is being present in the moment and being aware of one’s thoughts and mood non-judgmentally. Mindfulness has the proven benefit of increasing personal awareness – learning how and why our emotions can enable us to take greater control of our mental wellbeing. Other known benefits include reducing stress and anxiety, decreasing anger and negativity, boosting the immune systems, and making people happier and more satisfied. Mindfulness is a skill that someone can practice and improve, but it takes a bit more effort.
Happy people will also look after themselves in other ways, such as by practising self-care and ensuring they get enough sleep. Self-care can take the form of many things, but for it to truly work, it must be something you enjoy doing. It could be taking a bath, getting a massage, practising an instrument, art, or other recreational physical activity. Anything that can break the routine and is personally viewed as switching off or being a treat.
Happy people will also get enough sleep (for adults, 7-9 hours a night) and practice good sleep hygiene.
Build up your resilience!
Building resilience can result in a happier life. Learning how to face adversity, everyday stressors, and life’s setbacks means that even in bad times, you can improve your chances of feeling good again.
Happy people will know that resilience is a skill that can be improved. When you are resilient in one area of your life, it will likely flow over into another area. However, this is not automatic. It can be practised, and with intention, it can improve over time.
Happy people know that not every day is going to be a good day and that they do not have to be positive and upbeat all the time. They do not give up or lay down defeated; they rise to the challenge, dust themselves off, and try again.
Be Kind!
Happy people are kind to others, whether through volunteering, dedicating themselves to a cause, or helping family and friends. They are open-minded and not afraid to change their opinions or learn from others.
Importantly, they are also kind to themselves. The saying goes, “You cannot pour from an empty cup.” Happy people know that it is not selfish to look after yourself and put your emotional needs first. This may include saying “no” or turning certain things down, but if this is necessary for their well-being, happy people know that other opportunities will come along.
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